The number of times I've cried is more than once in a while. I cried the least today. Two times the whole day. Record this week. I swear I am very very tempted t take friend out and slash but I don't wanna hurt Atiq and whoever told me not t cut. But I am THIS close to cutting, and I'm really tempted cause there's no point in living anyway. I'm becoming who I was before. Someone I wasn't proud of back then but I'm becoming the old Joyene. The depressed, sad, self mutilative one. I tried t change. I tried for the people around me. For nat, for mummy. But I'm really disappointed in myself. Cause I keep letting them down. Joyene, the failure of the century. I'm noone. I'm just Joyene, sitting in the corner crying with a razor in her hand.
Let me bleed Let me cry Let me wonder why Let me die.
I'm in no mood for Hollaback Finals tmrw, but I'm going for the sake of getting out of the house. This place has become a jail. Mummy's locked the windows even though the grills are alr locked. I think she thinks I'm gonna commit suicide. Sheesh.
Looks like you've moved on for good.
- Joyene Ps, What Hurts The Most by Rascal Flatts is in my head.
